“I’m developing COWBOY BEBOP for Fox, but doing it as a live-action film, so I’m working on that at the moment,” Stoff tells iF. “I’m really excited to be working on it, and it’s in the really early stages. We just signed it the other day.”

Before any of you BEBOP fanboys/fangirls get your skivvies in a twist about yet another questionable anime-to-human adaptation (see: DRAGONBALL), iF made sure to get an oath of fidelity to the original material from Stoff.

“I have such an enormous admiration for its creators, that our first and foremost concern is going to be a real degree of faithfulness to the tone of the movie, to the mix of genres, and so on and so forth,” he says. “When I met with them in Japan, one of the first things that I brought up was the experience that we had on A SCANNER DARKLY, and how hard we worked to remain faithful to Philip K. Dick, and that was our big concern here.”

———————–

So yeah, I dunno. I mean, I just don’t know. Is there a call for this? Could it be good? Well sure. But will it be good? I just don’t know. I really am conflicted here.

Aren’t you, like, He-Man?

No! Damn it! I’m Prince Adam! We just look the same, so I get beat up a lot. I’m not He-Man, for the last time, I’m telling you!

Oh, well, if you say … I’m sorry. I could teach you how to defend yourself.

Would you? Oh golly that would be swell!

Sure thing!

All right, what do I do?

Well, first you, uhhh, you take this brush and paint my … uhm … my house.

Huh?

Karate is all about house painting. For reals. Look, do it like this. Up and down. Long strokes. Up and down. Paint the fence.

Uhhh, sure. Painting the fence.

There, see, now you know karate. Oh wait! You have to wax my car, too, I almost forgot!

Huh?

Here, wax on, wax off. Do that for like the next hour. I’ll be back.

If you say so…

Right, then, now you know karate! Those bullies won’t bother you anymore, and if they do you can just enter a tournament with them and then they’ll respect you.

I don’t feel like I know karate…

You do though! Here I’ll show you! I’ll punch you and you try and block!

Ow?

No, see when I punch you you’re supposed to be all “wax off” and block it with instinct and shit. Here, try and hit me and I’ll show you.

All right.

My… rib… cage…

HAHAHAHAHA!

What the…

Why do you losers always fall for that “I’m not He-Man” line? Holy shit, look at your face! All red and blotchy! Hahahaha! And I can see your rib, poking our of your side! That’s so fucking cool! HAHAHAH! Wax off! Wax on! Too funny!

Why would you do this… to me?

I dunno, I’m kinda a dick.

No… noted.

Hey, Skeletor! Wanna learn karate?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! No.

Awww come on! I’m not He-Man, I’m weak! I’ll teach you karate!

He-Man! He-Man! He-Man!

Am not!

He-Man! He-Man! He-Man!

What the fuck is wrong with those two?

Never teach the criminally insane the secrets of karate, Daniel-san.

Pat Morita’s spirit! Why didn’t you warn me earlier?

Are you nuts, kid? I’ve been wanting to see you well and truly fucked up longer than I waited for Happy Days residual checks. Destroy him, Johnny! Ha! Sweep the leg! Man, you are some kind of sucker, kid. Anyway, seeya!

Wait… no… Pat Morita’s spirit… don’t leave me to die…

No worries, kid. No one dies on my watch! I’ll save you!

Aw fuck.

TO BE CONTINUED!

(via Estelle Getty.com) Sadly, today July 22, 2008 at 5:35 a.m. Pacific Time, we said our last good-byes to our little friend Estelle, who passed away and made her journey to the great beyond. Although it was a trip that she never wanted to take, she went gracefully, in the comfort of her own home, surrounded by her family and her very loving care-givers.

Estelle’s legacy will live on and on through the comedy and laughter she gave to us all, which will forever keep us laughing out loud.
—————
Sophia has died. Kicked the bucket. Is no more. Let all Golden Girls fans mourn. That means you, D.J.

And uhm, anyone else.

Thing the second: Ever seen a leopard attack and kill a crocodile? Wanna?

I won an award for spelling.

Those who know me can now stop laughing long enough to breathe. I really did. It was a gold painted plastic trophy, on a fake marble base, that stood at least 5 inches tall. It had a generic plaque without my name on it.

It is the only trophy I have ever gotten, and the only award I have ever actually won. And it taught me something. I never want to win another award.

See I won that award and I haven’t been able to spell since! I mean, it’s just bad luck. I am convinced if I win an award for something I will lose the skill associated with that award. Convinced.

Ryan discussed a new career that involves a shovel. I reviewed Wanted and then reviewed the fajita burrito. DJ talked about Facebook, Kirk and reviewed Dark Knight without having seen it. I wrote about worldview issues and then about a monk who plays heavy metal, for reals.

Go enjoy, and stop by the footnote daily, because there are at least 3 posts a day, every day, M-F (weekends we only post like once, we’re slackers that way).

Now, what he’s saying is: Faith in God will cook you alive until steam comes out of your face and ass while your intestines boil and bake. Go religion!

Yup. There you go. The Earth, the moon, from 31 million miles away. That’s us.